Note: Picture credited to the Israeli Ministry of Tourism (www.goisrael.com)
We Must Go Again
After we arrived in Tel Aviv from the Dead Sea, I felt a strong pull to go visit Tzfat again. However, I also felt we needed to visit Lake Kinneret by traveling through the city of Tiberias.
Next morning with the first sign of the light, walking alone in yet quiet streets, once again we were heading to a bus station. We took the first bus, and we were once again sitting in the bus. This time we were traveling in the direction of the freshwater lake.
Lake Kinneret lies 700 feet below the sea level. Later on, I learned that Tiberias is considered to be one of the holiest cities along with Jerusalem and Tzfat.
We arrived in Tiberias around three o’clock on 09.24.08. I did not know why I was there. However, the minute we arrived at the bus station, I felt the need to be next to Lake Kinneret. We walked into the closest hotel and asked them to point us in the way of a hotel that has access to Lake Kinneret.
After wandering for a while, we found a hotel next to the beach and got a room for one night. By the time we checked into the hotel and entered the room, we were fully exhausted and hungry.
However, when we opened the curtains and balcony door of our room, I was taken away by the view of the sunset and everything that surrounded Lake Kinneret. Our balcony hung over the lake.
In a matter of minutes, the exhaustion disappeared, and I felt incredibly calm and rested. I dropped everything I had in my hands and almost ran to the patio below. There was this inner necessity to be next to the water during the sunset.
The wind was brushing against my face, and there was tremendous calmness and nourishment coming from the lake, wind, and mountains. I felt as if someone was cradling me. I felt as calm as a baby falling asleep next to a mother’s bosom.
I returned to the room and went straight to bed. Perhaps for the first time since my son’s shift, I slept like a baby. Next morning I woke up really early and had an early breakfast, and by eight o’clock, I was sitting on the rocks next to the lake with my feet in the water.
My son came and sat right next to me on the rock. First we were sitting in silence. None of us wanted to break this unspoken connection that was between us. I felt his energy so close. I did not even want to move. Then my son calmly started to talk. He asked me to keep notes, once again, and so I did. Below is a recorded conversation.
09.25.08 8:28 a.m. Lake Kinneret
Hi, my dearest mommy. Here we are on Lake Kinneret—Lake of Completion. There are no tears, no salt, only living water with the simplicity of life—water, rocks, fish.
The nature that is represented here represents human life. Kinneret was born here. Kinneret belongs here. Kinneret cannot move from here. And because Kinneret is here, other creatures can create a life for themselves.
So are you, Mom. None of the countries on this Earth is your destination. Your home is earth. Where you are is where life is.
G-d has a plan for you and your life. The point is, every blade of grass has an angel, and you have many watching over you and delivering you bits and pieces of G-d’s land just as I am delivering to you now.
And if not asking G-d for anything brings peace to your soul, then do not ask. Just trust that G-d is compassionate and he loves you and he will give you everything you need and what is right for you.
You will not feel that something is not given. Learn to accept what is. Learn to walk away from something that doesn’t feel good to you. You should never force something on yourself that is not right for you.
So if you can find your Kinneret within—no tears, no salt, just simplicity—that would be great. Then many lives could make a living next to you. Inner Kinneret is what I wish for you. That is why you are here.
In regard to the Dead Sea, it is the soul of the Healer and represents the peak of healing. It is made of strong concentration, focus, isolation, and no other forms of life. The soul of the Healer heals others so they can return to the Kinneret—the rocks, water, and calm life. In other words, the Dead Sea gives life to those who need healing and helps them return to the Kinneret.
Its counterpart, the Red Sea, represents entertainment. There is fish, but it does not represent everyday life. It perhaps represents the holidays. That is why I could not be at the Red Sea because I was not here for entertainment.
Remember, this is all only a metaphor for inner life. I only want and wish that you will come back to the simplicity of regular life. For that, you need an inner Kinneret, not an inner ocean where there is so much salt and drama.
I want you to be more even, not so many waves, tears, and everything else. I also want you to go to Tzfat because they have something to say to you. Go calmly. Relax, enjoy, and learn to create your own Kinneret.
I love you, Mom—your star (celestial) son.
No Escape. No Back Door.
After my son finished speaking, something shifted in me. The shift was that I suddenly understood and became fully aware that in this life, I cannot exit through the back door. I cannot commit suicide no matter how painful and intolerable life is. (We must speak about this subject. So many are leaving by using a back door.)
In that moment sitting next to Lake Kinneret with my feet in the water, I promised to myself that I would never exit through the back door. My relationship with G-d should not depend on the circumstances around my life whether I accept or don’t accept what is happening.
Right there with my feet in the warm freshwater, I received amazing clarity on the fact that my relationship with my life and Divine forces does not end during bad times. They only become stronger.
My son was asking me to rise above that personal darkness, above pain, above devastation, and the temptation to escape through the back door. He asked me to not be involved in the drama and sorrow of life.
He asked me to create something out of the darkness that would produce life for me and opportunities for others to have a life next to me. To do that, I had to accept what was given or taken from my life.
As my son said, I had to trust that Divine Providence would be there. From that moment, I knew I had to consider what relationship I had with the Divine.
The reality that my son wanted me to choose was right underneath my feet—freshwater—a basic need for life. To create an oasis in the Desert of Death, freshwater must be used from the well.
This was one of the most important lessons I learned from my son. Only Divine Providence can give us water in the Desert of Death. Only Divine Providence can point at where the water is.
It touched me and moved me. I could not wait to share this message with my husband. Both of us felt the deep change within.
We checked out of the hotel and spent several hours walking in the city next to the lake. We did not want to leave. It was calm, peaceful, and so majestic. There was something magnetic in that area that I can’t explain.
We decided to have lunch there. Right next to the lake. Freshly prepared fish right out of the lake was simply delish. Local cuisine was absolutely a perfect match for us and our taste. We did not want to leave, but we knew it was time to move forward.