11:15 a.m.

Voice:

Everything starts and ends with the innocence of the soul.  When the soul is innocent, it’s present, alive, vibrant, and joyful.  It has the vibration of compassion. When the soul loses its innocence, it starts to hide, loses its light and joy, and goes to comatose.

Truth is a ring. Truth is a protector.  Truth is a shield. It keeps the soul innocent.  Truth is the guardian at the door of the soul.  Truth can keep the demons away.  Truth, kindness, and compassion are a must for the innocence to survive.

In order to heal a soul and bring it back from comatose, love must be present.  Love, patience, vision, and very deep compassion are needed for someone who has lost the innocence of their soul.

Love, patience, and compassion are the vibrations that must be present in order to care for a soul. That someone who attempts to heal someone else’s soul must have devotion: strong, immovable, devotion.

7:59 p.m.

Note: Once again I was questioned about my final choice in regards  of  choosing between two realities.  They wanted to assure that my choice was final and that choice was now a new direction and  approach in  my life.  The purpose of this conversation is to assist me to be become more clear before everything is finalized. 

Your choice lies within
Yourself, hidden in the depth of the soul

The answer must come as a wave to you without torture or pursuit

What your life stands for is known to G-d, who gave it to you.
Not to your mom
Not to people around you
Or country or your children.
Or anyone but you.

Your life belongs to you.
You might not be able to face what is given but you must choose how to live.
The longest earthy
Still very short, just a moment in time

It comes and it leaves as candlelight
Very, very, very bright.

You still have some time left
According to your chart
Close your eyes and choose today
Choose now how you will walk the rest of your days

We need your answer very soon
We are with you, your son with us,
Waiting together for your choice.

We gave you time; we gave you space.
Now you decide.  Are you with us?
We will wait for you till sun is down and after that we ask you for your answer

9:00 p.m.

Points (choices) of contract 

• To accept and understand that I was created by the Master of the Universe and therefore I must accept my life as a gift from G-d.
• To be open to Divine Providence and give loyalty to Divine Providence.
• To understand that everyone’s life is a G-d’s plan.  My stress and worries do not provide protection to someone I love.  It only creates negativity.
• Learn to trust G-d’s will and what he is providing.
• Accept the knowledge that Death does not exist and that we are on a long journey working here and there.
• My son’s soul is alive: vibrant and safe. We are not lost or separated.  What we were we still are and will always be together.
• Therefore, regardless of what is present in my life under any circumstances, I shall never ever return to the thoughts of suicide.
• I must hold a deep sense of knowledge that I am under Divine protection and that I will be guided on my journey. I must accept that Divine Providence knows what is right for me.
• And with all that above, I must accept and trust the guidance given to me.  I am bound to listen to them carefully, take them seriously, and maintain pose of trust.

Note: After I agreed to the contract and a choice was made, so much energy surrounded me and blessed my new journey.

When I made that choice, it resolved the conflict between my son and me. It really shifted everything.  I understood that even though I made the choice to integrate them into my life, it would still require a lot of effort.  Many years after, it still does. At times I feel that I am failing to live up to that contract.

The mundane reality is still very heavy and present; I had to constantly remind myself of the other reality I’ve chosen as my main point of view in life, that is, putting my Soul in the driver’s seat. Making that choice did not result in the end of struggles or grieving or pain. I am still human.

It only meant a different direction, path, and paradigm of thinking. It takes everyday practice. With every year, it gets easier; less time is needed for recovery if a relapse happens, but not easy. I trust that with time, I will be able to master it. I trust that you too will be able to do so if you choose. 

Remembering that this is not all about me. But about the knowledge and the truth that was given to me. Trying to embrace that truth, molding myself into and becoming part of THAT. Being connected to THAT. Being immersed in THAT. Being in constant contact and communication with my son and Divine Energy. Staying in listening mode, so to speak.

Some days I manage better, some days I manage worse. What really makes the difference is the clarity of the path. And on that I am clear.